When and How Do I Give Up on My Drug Addict Son/Daughter?

An estimated 11.20% of overdose deaths in the United States are largely attributed to young adults aged 15 to 24. While not as significant as other age groups in the entire US population, this is still concerning knowing that a young person potentially has access to substance abuse. What's worse is that this trend may continue if not properly addressed. Surely, with that in mind, the question, "When do I give up on my drug-addict son or daughter?" may have crossed the minds of other parents who feel helpless about their children.

Transcend Recovery Community is here to help parents and families with what could be done with their daughter's or son's addiction. As a recovery assistance expert in the field of mental health and substance use disorders, we commit ourselves to provide all the information you may need to help your child suffering and unlock full addiction recovery. Continue reading to find out more.

Loving a Son or Daughter with an Alcohol or Drug Addiction

Providing the love and support that a drug-addict son or daughter may need from their family members is no walk in the park. It could also be an intense and equally emotionally-draining experience, most especially for many parents and guardians—especially when they find out for the first time about their daughter or son's addiction.

However, there are ways for parents and guardians to provide the emotional support and love their drug-addict son/daughter may need so that they can still live their lives despite this dark phase they have encountered.

Let's look at the following ways on how you can better show love and support to a drug-addict son or daughter struggling with their addiction recovery.

  • Educating one's self - To better understand your child's addiction, you must arm yourself with knowledge. Understand the problem and how your daughter or son's addiction may impact their lives. Only when you have understanding could you open yourself to compassion and love.
  • Expressing love despite your child's addiction - As a parent, feelings of resentment and guilt may rise as you deal with your daughter or son's addiction. Unconditional love may be tough at this point, but you must always reassure your addicted son or daughter that you are there to help them.
  • Do not engage in enabling - Providing support involves tough love. Just because you have wholeheartedly accepted your adult child and their drug abuse, it doesn't mean that you will enable them to continue their drug use. You must set boundaries and set a fine line about what you can offer them as a parent in improving their mental health.
  • Seeking help from professionals - Everyone accepts their fate in their own time. That said, when you feel you and your child are ready, you should accept the fact that your drug-addict child's recovery is dependent on the type of help they may receive from specialists. You may also incorporate adolescent mentoring alongside sober living to help your child to adjust to their addiction treatment and focus on improving their mental health.

While there may be many drug treatment options accessible to many, it is your responsibility as the parent to help your child alongside other family members in helping them choose the right path toward addiction recovery. It is through your constant love and support that can make a difference as they empower themselves during treatment.

Is There Ever a Time to Let Go

parents getting angry on their daughter addicted to drugs

When you feel that it is time to let go of someone due to their crippling addiction, the decision may hang heavily on the parent's shoulders. It's not easy to let go of someone, especially if they are your child who only needs love and support, or understanding as they grapple with their way to understand their addiction and mental health issues.

But there are instances when the difficult decision has to be made—especially if it's what's best for the person with addiction and their family.

The situations depicted below may be a huge deciding factor when a parent or their family decides to sever their ties with someone and other members of their families.

  • When the person in question starts to become a threat to themselves and their loved ones. If violence or reckless behavior worsens, protection must come first at all times.
  • When the party involved avoids receiving help. If your child or children deliberately declines the help you offer them for drug or alcohol rehabilitation.
  • When the individual promotes self-harm or has become violent and physically hurts their loved ones. It may not also be physical harm or pain inflicted that can be included here. Financial constraints brought about by expensive treatment options can also be another factor.
  • When all possible routes have been considered and still no significant and positive change has impacted the individual. If all solutions have been used and yet no real change has happened, then perhaps it's about time to let go of someone as this is beyond anyone's control.

You must remind yourself that letting go does not connote abandonment on the part of the family. There are just new boundaries being set by the parent for their child to grow by themselves which may prove to be healthy and beneficial for their relationship moving forward.

How To Let Go of a Son or Daughter Struggling with Alcoholism or Drug Addiction

Once you have carefully thought through this crucial decision, it's about time to take the necessary steps to help people as they let go of a situation:

  1. Set new boundaries - Tell them that part of this step is not supporting them or engaging them in any way that may enable them, such as giving money or covering up for their lewd or shrewd behaviors.
  2. Ask for help - Get help from family members or people who have once lost hope and faced anxiety and depression but have bounced back from their situation. You may also consider talking to professionals to process this difficult time.
  3. Engage in self-care - Self-care involves taking care of your entire well-being. Practicing mindfulness, exercising, eating healthy, and seeking therapy are just some things that encompass self-care.
  4. Convince them about taking treatment - Encourage them to seek treatment from rehab centers. You can offer support and resources but don't force them to take treatment.
  5. Acceptance - Accept in yourself that a son or daughter's addiction may be beyond your control. It is up to them for any positive change to manifest itself.

Reasons to Give Up

Giving up should be the last option that any guardian or parent may have with someone undergoing treatment. While there may be reasons leading a parent/guardian to choose this path, always note that every situation is unique and complex. Everyone must consider all factors before arriving at a final decision.

Always seek the wisdom of others, particularly professionals, counselors, and support groups before even considering this as your final and ultimate option. While drug abuse may be a challenging burden to bear for any parent or family member, know that there are still ways to cope with this. Whether it involves halfway houses and other forms of residential treatment to help a person ultimately get better.

Healthy Ways to Support a Son or Daughter Struggling with Addiction

There are always alternatives to help someone who has gone astray due to their addiction. While providing support from someone who has abused drugs may not always be easy, every member of the family must be there for that individual on their journey to recovery.

Here are some ways where you can express your support to a loved one who is struggling with their addiction.

  • Empower your loved one through active listening - let them feel seen heard and understood. Never judge, criticize, or blame someone for what happened. Instead, always practice empathy and remind them that you are there to support them.
  • Connect with a support group - Support groups often are well-equipped in helping people coping with drug-addicted loved ones to respond better to a loved one who is struggling with addiction. You may also feel a sense of camaraderie and support from a community that sees and understands you and what you're going through.
  • Take care of one's self - To better support your loved one, you should take care of yourself first. Otherwise, you can't provide the support they need if you are weak or incapable of doing so.
  • Outpatient drug rehab - For people who cannot stand inpatient or residential treatment, outpatient drug rehab may be a more comfortable arrangement for them.

Can Transcend Recovery Community Help Your Son or Daughter with Addiction Treatment?

Yes, Transcend Recover Community understands the difficulties that may come along with a family supporting their loved one with their addiction or mental health problems. Thanks to our holistic approach to recovery, we transform people's lives for the better, letting them live their second life with long-term sobriety in mind. Contact us to find out more about how we can help you.

Transcend Recovery Community

Transcend Recovery Community family of sober living homes provides a safe place for those undergoing mental health and addiction treatment to live with like-minded peers. Our community-based approach to sober living (similarly to a halfway house) facilitates an open and welcoming environment, where members, staff and team can provide support and encouragement on the path to a sober and healthy life. Transcend's Los Angeles sober living homes are located in some of the most iconic areas of the city, filled with luxurious and upscale amenities, providing plenty to do for those in our transitional housing community.

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